The thing here is that I always manage to kill the plants under my care. Either I water them too much (maybe out of guilt of having previously forgotten to do so) or I just forget that they need water and sun (or partial sun or partial shade) to survive. But this time it has been different.
Now get this, I had notice how well my plant was doing and encouraged I was thinking of trying my hand at a second one. Then came John’s comment and with his comment a boost of confidence! I can take care of plants.
My new-found success with plants made me realize the importance of feeling confident for future successes. Because I have had a positive experience with this plant, I was encouraged to buy a second one.
Come to think of it, creating confidence in our dogs has the same effect. When we vow to teach them to become more comfortable with their environment we instill confidence. I can think of the example of putting on a harness on a dog that has never worn one (or a muzzle, collar, walk on leash, etc.) step by step - making sure that the dog is participating at his/her own pace in the process instead of forcing the dog to fit into the piece of equipment.
I remember once in the Bay area where my clients have talked to someone that convinced them that their Golden had to be able to walk on top of the drainage grate, so when the three of us went to their local park they showed me what they were doing in order to have the dog walk on the grate. Unfortunately for the dog, my clients have failed to pay attention to how their dog was perceiving this new experience and what he was communicating by his body language. When I saw this, I asked them why was it that they insisted their dog walk on top of the drainage grate and her answer was: "Because he has to."
Don’t get me wrong folks, these people LOVED their dog dearly but unfortunately they were not seeing life from their dog’s point of view. Sure, I agree that there are always things and situations that our dogs can learn to handle with more finesse, less stress and even enjoy more but rest assure that the goal is as important as the process.
Of course we can, for example, stop the dog from barking by shocking him with a collar without even investigate as to why is he barking. There are other solutions to this annoying problem: We can teach the dog an alternate, an incompatible behavior to the barking. Or we can modify the environment, or
manage the dog and the environment. Yes indeed, we can teach the dog to come to us by zapping him with a shock when he does not readily come to us but, but… is this really how we want to relate to our animals?
Dogs are not unlike children who soar when praised (or given something they find really valuable when they have done something we approve of). Our dogs also need our encouragement so that they can learn with less “wear and tear”. One of the ways to achieve this is to build their confidence little by little by carefully observing the dog for signs of too much stress fear or anxiety as they
are exposed to something novel or fear inducing (from the dog’s point of view). The truth is that there is always a better way for us to teach our dogs.
Animal trainer Bob Bailey coined the phrase or concept of “splitter” or “lumper”. And he asks: Are you a “lumper” or a “splitter”? If you are a “lumper” you then “lump” or organize learning without much consideration for how the process is affecting the learner, you kind of just lay it all out and hope that the animal can learn and cope with the “material”. A splitter will “split” or present the material in very small steps. The steps are as small as they need to be for the animal to be successful every step of the way. The trainer only moves forward with a higher level of difficulty once the animal has shown proficiency in execution of the step one is training. Can you see how this approach considers the well-being of the animal, the process of learning and the end result or final behavior? Which believe it or not will be more resistant to extinction.
I realize that sometimes we just want to get to our goal… there are pressures everywhere to be faster and more “productive”. It is so easy I know, to fall victim to this MO. Perhaps though, what we all need are often reminders about how terrific it is to feel confident. Confidence is a better place to be and a much better platform for learning.
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